How many times have you faced situations where you imagined something to happen but the exact opposite happen? Think about your emotions and reactions during that time. Were you under control? Many people cannot handle their emotions during such situations and their reactions have significant impact to their life. I have had these problems in the past and I still do react very emotionally at some incidents. It is a very common thing you can see in many people around you. The art of “emotional intelligence” is not very common.
In my own personal life, I have tried and tested few methods to improve my reactions. Here is a list of things that worked –
- Keeping a set of confidantes – Confidants, in my life, are people with whom I share anything and everything. Not only your secrets, but also your sorrows and at times your frustrations. I have a few of them in my life. Whenever I get frustrated, I vent it out at them. These people know why I called and they will just listen out to my anger. I will eventually calm down myself after repeating the same story couple of times.
- Prepare for the best and hope for the best – We all plan for things to work the way we imagine. But life is not fair. So failure should always be a part of the plan (the imagination). You run through all the possibilities – Good and Bad – in your head before you take up something. This way, any outcome is known prior to the eventuality – Reducing your frustration and controlling your reaction. In the most recent season of Game of Thrones, Littlefinger explains to Sansa.
- Write everything – This is something I keep doing. On my Microsoft OneNote app, I write these continuous thoughts and frustrations that keep coming to me. Keep writing them whenever you feel something has gone wrong, something did not work the way it should.. document all your feelings in there. And once in a while, go back and read those. You will automatically have a better state of mind the next time something like that happens. You will be better prepared.
If you can follow atleast one of these three, you will be more happier than you are right now when things go wrong. I hope this helps.